Schmappy Schmalentine's Day

So I wasn't going to do anything for Schmalentine's Day, mainly because I don't have a girlfriend but also because its a bit of a corny way to ask a girl out on a date. However I got chatting to some mates yesterday and they said I should just give something to a girl anyway to make her feel special. So this is what I did.

I wrote a card and left it in her drawer at work with a chocolate. The card had a picture of a whale saying "Whale you be my Valentine?" and a dolphin saying "Dolphinitely". I stole the joke but she won't know. I also wished her good luck because thats polite. Check out those sick art skills. I think that was the first time an animal has looked anything like it is supposed to.

On the back of the card I told her the best love story I know. Its the story about Uncle Caveman.

When I was a kid my favourite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.

I am what some people call 'a romantic'.